Cleaning Up Is The Worst Thing In The World. Karen Morgan

Cleaning up is the worst thing in the world! especially if you have a difficult husband like Karen Morgan.

Video Script:: 

so my husband and I share a closet I don't recommend this for any new couples the hell there don't do it it was a bad idea but we're stuck with it I've been trying to clean out this closet for the past eight months using the Marie Kondo decluttering method I see some of you know it if you don't know it congratulations you're supposed to put all your clothes on the bed and then you're supposed to go through each piece one at a time and then if you if you ask the magic question does this spark joy if the answer is yes you keep it if the answer's no then you take it to Goodwill now sadly the Marie Kondo decluttering method only works on things not people it also be a lot of teenagers dropped off at the goodwill so I got through my clothes and I told him I'd help him with his so we got through one shirt of his I held it up and he said you want me to ask that shirt what does that shirt spark joy what does that even mean does it mean do I like it I don't know you bought it do you think the shirt sparks join for me I didn't even know this shirt was in this closet this may not even be my shirt are you having an affair didn't go well so the only person having an affair in our house is our dog okay who thinks he's having an affair with me because my husband won't let the dog sleep in the bed with us and when my husband goes out of town I let the dog sleep with me he's hairy he snores it's just like having my husband there but when my husband comes home the dog knows he's done wrong he's broken the rules so he will not make eye contact with my husband he just looks at the floor I'm sorry I'm sorry I slept with your wife I am so sorry [Applause] there is another cleaning method that they do in Sweden it's called Swedish death cleaning this is a real thing the premise behind Swedish death cleaning is you're supposed to get rid of all your clutter before you die so that you don't burden your loved ones with all your stuff right well I'm not doing it I have cleaned up after these people way too long [Applause] right before Adama by giant warehouse and I'm going to fill it with dirty laundry just stinky socks and wet towels and wadded up underwear and then I'm gonna hide all my cash money in the dirty laundry [Applause] so they have to go through all the laundry to find the cash money and then I'm gonna occasionally just stick a note in there this is see how high this fun you should have picked up your socks [Music] hey did you know that Drybar comedy has their own app you can download it right now to watch my whole special